"Is Tuesday night, but fuck you for wanting to sleep!"
"Wait a second, I'm one the top floor". Falls over and dies from a meth overdose.
"You can't call the cops NOW..."
(20yrs old now, still clean and sober from everything.)
(Also, yes, the cops hate them but they're required to answer anyway.)
18 for the draft. Mental country so it is.
2, then.
A few hours warning isn't much of a warning ....
A joggers wet dream
A party where one person has just reached the legal drinking age means that a lot of their friends won't have hit it yet. Plus, parties are more fun than bars, in general.
A Reddit star is born.
Agreed. Rando booze is never a good way to start the night. Try some nice cans of wine instead.
Agreed. When I was about 20, I was living in my first apartment with my now ex-girlfriend. There were people of a wide range of ages living there, but the person who lived in the apartment above mine was about my age. Lots of stomping coming from up there, but we didn't say anything about it to them or anyone else; we quietly complained to ourselves. One night, she decided to party with some people. We could hear music, stomping, and voices having a good time. We were really pissed, but still didn't say anything to anyone... until around midnight or one AM, the upstairs neighbor, identifiable by her shrill shouting voice, opened the sliding glass door to her porch and yelled "cocks and titties," immediately closed the door, immediately re-opened it, and repeating the process several times. This went on far longer than it should have, and we called the apartment's courtesy office at that point. He took care of it. The upstairs neighbor didn't throw anymore parties and moved out within a couple of months.
Ah, yes. The courtesy "two speaks notice".
Alcohol. The cause of, and solution to all of life's problems.
Also, give them a drink that's properly sealed.
And skip protection?
And teens get stupid with drinking and drugs, then get behind the wheel. Often speeding or racing or getting too f#cked up to drive.
And you are busted...sinner.
Apparently I'm the only asshole here who still wouldn't want my upstairs neighbors raging while I'm trying to sleep.
Are you my neighbor? Blink twice if you need saving from the awful music
As a mechanic, I've learned that it would take more than 4 shots of antifreeze to take me down
As long as it's on a weekend I wouldn't care. But shit, 4am comes early for me Monday thru Thursday.
As long as they aren't raging every weekend, they should get a free pass to get as rowdy as they want that night. They gave warning, shared the fun with their neighbors and let you know it's for a special occasion. Solid moves all around.
As many times as i referenced this you'd think id do it by now. Yet here i am spilling my drinks all over the god damn place.
Be prepared to lose the bottle as a "birthday gift" if, you know, you're accidentally giving off a creeper vibe.
Bottles are super easy to recycle, just smash them on the sidewalk and they basically vanish.
Boxes/cans are much better. Get on the right side of history mate and can the fuck up.
Bring a 12 pack as a gift and celebrate.
But the whole point is that the person is supposed to get carded because they still look young or borderline age. Then they get to whip out ID and smile 'im 21!'
But yes, the US has always confused me as to how it seems that these restrictions are just a superficial tip of the hat to Puritianism whilst it's ok to go Sodom and Gomorrah everywhere else.
But, what if I don't like alcohol?...
Can of wine???
can the fuck up
Clay - if you are out there and not in prison, I know you absconded with my diskman in 1998. If I find you... well I dunno - maybe we can grab a drink or something.
'Cuz one can make a dream come true.
DEUS VULT
Dicks are like fruit.
Did I do it right?
Did the discman have bass boost?
Did you run around the apartment building checking for free shots in front of everyone's doors?
Didn't even realize that was a poem.
Directed by M. Night Shyamalan
Do that in the afternoon or something. It really isn't that exciting. The only time it is amusing is when you've been using a fake at the same bar for ages and then get to use your real ID and amuse the bar staff.
Do we want to know how you know?
Doc here. Latest research shows that any drugs before 21 can mess with neurodevelopment. Yes that includes weed.
Does this belong to r/nosleep?
Doesn't mean I want to put one in my mouth though.
Don’t go in the fuck room and be surprised when someone wants to fuck!
Don't break my butt.
don't do drugs kids
Don't knock it til you try it
Drink em and leave a note under their door, "Takes more than two to tango baby"
Edit: its gone :(
Edit: to add to this. I also have 2 young kids so 24 hours notice on a big party going on would be a life saver. Wouldn't even be made at having to crash at the in-laws.
Eh just lock the door behind yourself. Worst case scenario you get a crazy hangover from the drugs. Or die from rat poison because they are from a crazy person. Either way have fun.
Empty out a diet coke can, and fill it with red wine. Now you're talking, you're expressive with your hands, and you aren't spilling wine all over the place. It's goddamn genious.
Especially since, unlike many Older cities in Europe that were designed for walking, and have everything local in walking distance.
Eventually we wrote her a letter inviting her round for a chat and a beer.
Everyone is going to hate me for this but I'm pretty much never cool with insane apartment parties that go til 3 am and are loud af on a weeknight. I'm cool if it's Saturday and everyone is headed out at midnight for the bars. If you live in an apartment you have to make sacrifices because you share walls with others. If you want to have banging house parties, you've gotta live in a house in the right neighborhood where no one will mind. Or go to the entertainment district for the night and bar hop. That's just part of being an adult in society. Free shots or no, birthday or not, even if you give 24 hr notice, you have to learn to compromise with the people around you to avoid trampling their rights.
Exactly. I don't know how many neighbours I've had that treat an apartment like a detached house. I can hear every fucking word John Wick is saying and he doesn't talk that loud, motherfucker!
Except its clearly girls
First rule of an Eyes Wide Shut type orgy is you don't talk about an Eyes Wide Shut type orgy.
For my old roommate's 21st, we just invited the downstairs neighbors to the party. They can't get mad at us for the party if they're part of it.
Fuckit have an upvote for honesty.
GHB is like the saltiest motherfucking thing ever. You would know because that shot would taste like cum jello.
GHB is tasteless in jell-o. Sleep well, lock your door.
good bot
good bot
good human
Good man... Keep it up!
Here, in Denmark at least, it's normal that you give a week notice to the complex that you're holding a party. People are usually cool with it, if you don't yell out the windows or blast the music with open windows. Turn down the volume a notch after 23 and all is normally good.
He's a poet, He knows it.
Hey buddy, I think I left a pair of tennis shoes and a discman at your place. I was hoping to swing by and pick them up... maybe we can party for a bit? I can only stay for a few days though because I have a traffic ticket to fight dt on the 5th. I'll bring some Fresca
Hey thanks!
Honest assholes are better than dishonest polite people.
Hopefully you got on something good, not Intervention.
how about: I dont drink and my sleep is not negotiable. I guess you could pay for a hotel room for me if it's really that important to you.. oh it isnt? thats cool
How do you do nothing for a year and then post five comments in 10 minutes?
How long has this been going on? How do you even put up with it? Do you at least defecate in his mailbox ?
Huh, that actually makes sense. Thanks for enlightening me!
I always smoke alone. I used to love smoking with other people and talking for hours and hours, but nowadays I just get too paranoid. It sucks. Last time I smoked, my friend brought all these randos over to my house and at first it was fun but they stayed for like 48 hours and by the end I'm looking around thinking, "who the fuck are these people? they all look like fucking maniacs."
I can't be the only one who wouldn't drink this right?
I don't give a shit if my neighbors wanna throw a party at night, I give a shit when it's 2am and I don't know if it's gonna end soon or if they'll be going til dawn.
I drank a bottle of Wild Turkey during my going away party before I moved. Never again.
I feel like drinking wine out of a can is conducive to my violent hand gestures
I hate it when people seem to think that the only thing you need to do
I mean there's a reasonable limit though. At some point I need to be able to sleep for work to keep from having a miserable day tomorrow. Doesn't mean I'll call the cops as a first line of course, but....
I might be getting old, but if you live in an apartment building don't have house parties?
I might toss them away, go to the party, tell them they were great and ask if they can spare another dozen so I get the same ones they are drinking!
I seriously thought it was some shatter wax
I thought boxed wine was the lowest wine could go. Now we have canned wine..
I was hanging around meth and heroin when I was 13. Every single one of those people got busted for bigger crimes and are probably still in prison. I'm glad I was a smart kid, well, smart to the point where I was hanging out with tweakers and junkies everyday but ALWAYS said NO.
I wouldn't because who the fuck knows what's in 'em and I'm also a heretic who doesn't drink alcohol, so..
i’m not sure i would just drink the laced jello with a dubious note... that’s a kidnap plot right there...
If I was holding a wine glass right now I'd be spilling wine all over the god damn place.
If it has a scheduled end time it's probably not much of a party.
If you live in an apartment and want to "get rowdy" you should have thought about living in an apartment.... Go out to a club or some shit. Walls are too thin for that sort of stuff.
If you live in an apartment you don't get free passes, the rules are there for a reason. If you want to get shit faced and rowdy go out and do it.
If you wanna be fucked up from the floor up, it takes more than 4 to get tore up.
I'm a European who used to believe the stereotype of "Americans drive everywhere because they're lazy" - that was until I visited the US and saw how spread out everything was and was like ah, now I understand why everyone has a car. I used to also think it was weird that teenagers would start driving so young, but outside of the cities there doesn't seem to be much of a rail network, and I used to think people were exaggerating the "public buses are scary" image but then I saw the buses and can completely understand why someone wouldn't want to take one.
I'm jealous of your username
I'm possibly biased because I have shit neighbors who party loudly all the god damn time at the worst fucking hours and don't ever bother to give notice, so eh. I also just hate party culture in general bc I live in a college town. What you gonna do except bitch about it online tho lmao
I'm stealing that.
I'm still pissed at Clay for stealing my diskman out of my car.
Injected*
It is late, I am tired, and I was wondering what you being an optometrist had to do with Jello shots. Time for bed.
It looks like they're actually might be 4 little cups under the note
It takes a bakers dozen to smoke a bunch of meth.
It takes more than 4 to hit the floor.
It takes more than four to foreplay? I don't get invited to parties anymore..
It'll find you.
its also a tuesday night...
Its not just a date rape drug you know. It just has a bad rep. apparently its better than alcohol but its easy to overdose on
ITT: Assholes more miserable than I am.
Jello shots made with tranquilizers
Just drink some vodka after and you'll be fine.
just make the last word in each line
Killing themselves, passengers, friends, pedestrians, other drivers, including young children & babies, or even whole families.
Laced with sleeping pills
Like soft music? Or ambient lighting?
Lovely lady, the complaints stopped.
Man, bottles are bullshit. Delicate, dangerous, hard to move around the world, harder to recycle. No better at keeping wine fresh.
Man, I'm getting old, but.... you are totally right.
me too thanks
Mediocre liquor
meh bot
Meh, long as they shut the fuck up at a reasonable hour.
Movie, date night, stay at friends, change you shift at work, buy a 40 and join the party...
Multiple accounts.
My upstairs neighbor has loud ass screaming parties twice every week. Usually one during the weekend, then one on like tuesday/Wednesday. It drives me nuts sometimes. Fuckers smoking out on the balcony screaming, music vibrating my apartment, people dropping cigarettes on my terrace. And the parties usually last until 4 or 5 am too. I'm gonna murder that guy someday
Newest thing mate. Keep forever, lots of punch in them. Trader joes has them, as do most liquor stores.
No alcohol before 21 but an ak 47 on the other hand... Makes sense...not...
Nobody in my family did meth or heroin. But, alcohol destroyed it..
Normally if i did this my wine would spill out, but this is great!
Not a bot
Not in my backyard!
Not sure if I'm jealous of your lifestyle or kinda disgusted lol
Nothing on this sub even gets a chuckle out of me wtf is this shit
Now that would make me super okay with any party
On a more serious note, if you live in an apartment building, you can be noisy until 10 on a weekday, and midnight on the weekend. Warning or not, you're being a real dickhead if you go beyond that.
Or
Or dont drink because antifreeze. I'm too cynical to party.
Or just don't be inconsiderate and loud in the first place.
Our roads ans Highways are full of makeshift memorials of wreaths, flowers, and notes indicating where a drunk driver killed another teen or mother & child walking down the road.
Past midnight most people just want to sleep.
People like that annoy me.
Poems are like fruit.
Poor people
Pretty presumptuous. Not everyone drinks, plus rules are rules for a reason. The second the clock strikes 10 pm I'd be on the phone with the police. Not because I am opposed to drinking, or partying after 10pm, but simply because I'm an asshole and like to see people's good time ruined.
Probably drugged them so you sleep through their party
Rather r/outoftheloop
Realistic enough until the end... Reason #427 not to do meth.
Reason #1 was living with some friends at age 19 who dove in deep. Fuck that shit, I would rather retain the sanity I still have, thanks.
Requiring you to either need a designated driver or a Taxi, since often, walking to a local bar would be miles away.
Right? If you're going to be that loud and you live in an apartment then go to a bar. That's what they're made for.
Roofied in your own apartment? How would that even work if they can't get in?
Seriously- knowledge is relief.
Seriously, if I have to be a zombie at work because you are too cheap to go to a bar, I'm not gonna be happy.
Should've given your neighbors two speakers and a nice note.
Some can be good, some are not.
Some can be good, some are not.
sorta rhyme
sorted by: best
Sounds like you need to leverage this into an invitation
Speaking from experience, Jello is not that solid.
Steal it, peel it, wear it around. You got a new saying to bring on down.
Still blows my mind Americans have to wait til 21 (legally).
T H E Y G O N N A GET Y O U R B U T T
Takes less than 4 to turn me into a whore.
Takes more than four to get fucked up?
Thanks for the heads up, Dr Cosby.
That rhymed.
That was my thought too. I appreciate the kind note and all but fuck you, go out somewhere to party.
That's how I ended up in A&E once. My drink was spiked. Ruined a good night.
That's just enough to add a little zing to your step, and by zing I mean bell's palsy.
That's woman handwritin', time to grab a bottle and head on up.
The adult me agrees but college me drank whatever was handed to me.
The heads up is nice, but if you're loud and obnoxious and I can't sleep for my shift tomorrow I'm calling the cops anyway. Feel free to host people at home, and a note/gift are considerate, but if you're being loud and noisy asswipes at 2am I don't care how much heads up you gave friendo.. this is my home too.
The Long distances, open roads, with bars & clubs being on main roads away from homes.
The nosy 16 yr old me would have said thank you very much.
The optimist in me says you have great neighbors and enjoy those jello shots!
The people in the house next to me warned me of a birthday party by inviting me a few days before... I brought over a cupcake, got a few shots in me, and headed out. It was a good deal and they went somewhere else at 9pm. Probably the best neighbors I've ever had.
The people who live here go to work early. A party past 10, you are joking surely. Have some respect and go out to a bar. Drink to your health just don't drive a car.
The pessimist in me says that I have seen this scenario play out in a snuff video and watch out for those rufie shots!
The realist in me says OP made Jell-O shots and wrote a note
The rest of the building can though
There are about 25 houses in the area, what if they all did that "once a year". It would be fucking ridiculous having that level of noise twice a month. But everyone doesn't do it because most people don't suffer from the sense of entitlement that that particular neighbour did.
There is an easy test for these kinds of situations, just ask yourself what if everyone did it? What if every night was another special event, and every night all the neighbors got another pair of jello shots and dealt with the noise until 4am... How many nights in a row until it's not cool? If the answer is anything other than "this is totally fine all the time" then you're just abusing peoples good nature. Maybe they live in a college dorm area and this is totally fine, but maybe they live in a regular old apartment complex and your jello shots don't make up for you waking up everyone's kids, etc.
There is an obvious solution for this. All 25 of those houses should do their parties on the same day, then there won't be a problem! Every neighborhood should have a designated "party day" to facilitate this.
There's lots you can do...
They all have flavor.
They should be taking their friend out to the bar. That's what you do on your 21st birthday. Not get hammered at your apartment.
They should go out. Who rages in an apartment?
They're called forget me nows.
Theyre great for aggressive hand gestures
They're young, probably upper middle class college kids and still feel entitled to special treatment from the world. Part of gaining maturity and becoming older is learning that the world isn't always accommodating to your special circumstances/what you want.
This is actually how we made friends with one of the families that lived in our street. They wrote such a charming note about an upcoming party I knew they must be good people.
This really isn't that funny...
This was the first thing I thought.
This went on for months.
Time to put down the pipe, friend.
TLDR, "cocks and titties" will get you reported.
To anyone planning to copy this, I would just suggest at least 24 hours notice to your neighbors, don't drop this off the night of the party. Give people time to plan and most people will be cool.
to make something sound like a poem is to
top 200 commentsshow 500
twist: the shots are roofied so you sleep through the fun. they're conscientious, and very well prepared. best sleep of your life though!
Uh, that sounds bad.
Umm so many questions here.. biggest one is where did you see a snuff film?
Wait ! ! ! You're not invited ???
wait are you a bot? 0.o
We had a neighbor that had a loud ass party..live band and all..every year and tried to get on all the neighbors good side by inviting them. By 1-2 am every year they got the cops called on them (not by us!)
We have a big issue with drinking and driving and Teens making poor decisions, thats why its a drinking age of 21.
We have cities designed from the outset for cars & driving. Lots of rural areas and towns divided in a way that separates residential housing, with bars/clubs far away from living quarters. Like miles away from your home.
We were upstairs and I hear this screaming coming from downstairs. I run down there, and some woman is locked in the bathroom just screaming and shouting like "raaaaah! raaaaaah! fucking thor, man! fucking thor!" I'm like who the fuck is that? I didn't even know there was somebody downstairs, and I'm starting to fucking freak out. I hear shit just getting ripped up and smashed in there and this woman is screaming "thor on it! thor on it! fucking thor on it!" so I bust the door in and she's covered in blood and I grab her and pull her out of the bathroom and goddamnit, if it wasn't winona ryder
What a good/evil idea. Put a dose of ambient in the shots. Can't complain if you're in a coma.
What are they going to plan, ear muffs from eBay?
When I moved into a terraced house with two friends years ago we had a noise complaint weekly from the old dear next door. Even when we weren't particularly loud.
When it comes to whoring, its always right.
Where is her left arm in that art because I think the expression is a hint
Who like the taste of cum Jell-o?
Whoooah, you're real good at poeming!
Why is there a buffet at a goddamn orgy?!
Worse verse
yeah I think depends what you're going for, want to meet random people.. go to a bar, want to have fun with the friends you have, party.
Yeah my neighbours call the cops once a week whenever I sneeze too loudly. I don't see this working for me lol.
Yeah this is the way to do it. Last year my roommates and I got these new speakers for black Friday and our neighbors hate us to this day. Definitely should've been more considerate
Yeah we had a neighbour who had the loudest parties. They'd hire a PA system, it was outrageous. But it was okay because it's "only once a year"..
Yeah you know where that arm is ( ?° ?? ?°)
Yeah, can't say I have any desire to eat or drink stuff left on my doorstep.
Yeah, I'm actually with you here. You can't just leave a cutesy note and expect people to be cool with your partying all night. More likely than not you have some kind of noise clause in your lease agreement. People need to sleep and be up for work, kids might live there, etc. You can't just ask people to give up an evening of peace because someone turned 21. Go out to places meant for that type of thing. I'd 100% call the cops if they got too loud. You're an adult, which means you have to live by the rules.
Yeah, they could have at least got him a bottle of Wild Turkey or something.
Yet at 18 I had to register for the draft. 18 year olds are mature enough to smoke, buy guns, and die for their country, but not mature enough to handle some booze. I agree that drunk driving is terrible and I support working to prevent it, but you're either an adult or you're not. I can't advocate requiring a teenager to sacrifice their life but not giving them the privileges that they fight for. And I don't see why an 18 year old can't at least buy alcohol to drink in their own home-cant even buy wine to cook with.
You just gave me some horrible flashbacks haha toooo real
You know when I drink alone, I prefer to be by myself.
You left half your face upstairs...
You should be a little of both
You're forgetting the most important part: let them know when it's going to end.
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